[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YRWAXGTVbiY[/youtube]
Begin at 8:36.
NARRATOR:
And with that, GREGGERY turned and strode nonchalantly into his dinky little office with the desk and the catalog and the very hip water pipe, and proceeded, with a vigor and determination known only to piglets of a similarly diminutive proportion, to single-handedly invent THE CALENDAR! With his eyes rolled heaven-ward, and his little shiny pig-hoofs on the desk, GREGGERY ponders the question of eternity (and fractional divisions thereof), as mysterious ANGELIC VOICES sing to him from a great distance, providing the necessary clues for the construction of this thrilling new trend!
ANGELIC VOICES:
Sunday!
GREGGERY:
Sunday? Wow!
Sunday, Saturday,
Tuesday through Monday,
Monday,
Sunday, Saturday!
NARRATOR:
And thus THE CALENDAR, in all of its colorful disguises was presented to the bored & miserable people everywhere! GREGGERY issued a memo on it, whereupon the entire contents of the Steno Pool identified with it strenuously, and worshipped it as a way of life, and took their little pills by it, and went back 'n forth from work by it, and paid their rent by it. And before long they were even having birthday parties in the office by it because now, at last, GREGGERY PECCARY’s exciting new invention had made it possible for everyone to find out how old they were.
GREGGERY:
What hath God wrought?
NARRATOR:
Unfortunately, there were some people who simply did not wish to know. And that’s why, on his way home from the office one night, GREGGERY was attacked by a rage of HUNCHMEN! Making his way through the evening traffic, GREGGERY notices that the other vehicles which crowd and bump his little red car are all inhabited by slowly-ageing, very hip, young people. They appear to be casting sinister glances toward him through their glinting, acid, burn-out eyeballs, trying to run him off the road, or make him bump into something - giving strong evidence of hostile aggression!