Why can’t I touch my toes with the tips of my fingers? I have NEVER been able to do this, I just can’t seem to stretch my arms down enough, my back aches, doesn’t give…are my legs to long, my arms to sort, my brain to small…alas this is a tiny ineffectual issues…but I just felt the need to air it…pathetic really…
Apple Assault:
Walking home tonight a car passed me by and an apple flew out an assualted me, the worst thing is the apple was smeared and dripping in SALIVA! it whacked the pocket which my hand was in and just smashed everywhere and the SLABBERS oozed all over my right arm coat and my hands - it was vile! How random is that? Mans inhumanity to man - never stops!
It was pretty hilarious, I thought, I just looked back, kept walking and thought…such wonders of life! moments of pure random flying apples…O irriate yuppies in fast cars, you couldn’t see the funny side…I’m sure!
Careful, Ad. Do that now and dad comes out with a 9mm and toasts you for threatening his kid - and his lawyer get’s him off. You’re widowed bride runs to a WWF star for ‘consolation’, and mom and dad just sit and look at each other asking where they went wrong…
Short arms. I’ve no problem doing this, but I’m blessed with tremendous flexibility
When a similar thing happened to me I made great effort to cause as much damage to the car as I could with the gravel that was to hand. I wasn’t particularly successful. I did wallop a semi-drunken hoodlum who pursued me down the road shouting abuse at me and since then he’s been scared every time he sees me. I only hit him once, and it was open-handed (painful but not damaging) but I think he got the message.
There is a local lad who accuses me of being a gippo. It could be the beard, torn shirtsleeves and long hair…