open

Creative Forums Creative Writing
1

it comes to you when you least expect it,
finds its way in through whatever you left open,
‘cause if something’s open, anything at all,
it senses, alive as it is.
alive and well.
and incessant.

so you button things up
and batten things down,
vainly, as it turns out,
in both senses of the word.
‘cause it enters, and humbles,
lingers awhile,

long enough until you feel calm with it,
just that long.
just that long.
you don’t see it go,
you didn’t really see it come in, after all.

you see the calm go,
that’s what you see go,
and you try to get that back and it takes
awhile.
and then you run around buttoning things up again,
and battening things down.

2

nostalgic and lonely for something.

interesting take with the obviousness of the rain
and the suggestion of it’ metaphorical aim
: could always try and make it clearer
i.e what is the rain in this poem?

'you don’t see it go,
you didn’t really see it come in, after all.

you see the calm go,
that’s what you see go,
and you try to get that back and it takes
awhile.’

3

thanks. actually rainey’s just my user name. but if it’s about rain and the rain has to be something, it would be love.

4

I know rainey is your user name that’s what intially triggered my thoughts regarding the content of this poem actually being a reference to rain. You should re-read your poem as though it was a transcription of rain…and secondly as as a love poem.

This reads like a straight transcription of ‘something’ but this something is never revealed. You invoke no images…the reader is left wandering aimlessly.

5

“'cause if something’s open, anything at all,”