As a Crusader, I always stand ready to defend the Citadel of Christ against the onslaught of the infidels.
I stand, before you all, tall and proud. Ready, as I always have been, to defend my Faith with all my mind and all my heart.
“Halt, which foul demon goes there?” demanded PoR.
So, without further adieu, let the cosmic battle between Good and Evil, begin…
Which side doe you represent, Good or Evil? 
Sorry, I couldn’t resist. BTW, I think you mean “ado”, not “adieu”- that’s “goodbye” in French. (Couldn’t resist that either).
So Evil says there is no God, the Citadel that you are defending is irrelevant and a delusion, just leave PoR alone, ranting for all she (or he?) wants … life goes on … we do as we please, that which makes us happy …
Oh dear! I presume this post was prompted by GWB’s inauguration speech. That sent a shiver down my spine. Whilst I am well aware that religion gives comfort to many we now appear to be in an era of danger not seen since the Crusades. I shall therefore, to some extent repeat what I have put in previous posts and add something that made my hair stand on end when I realized.
The divine shekinah was a conjunction of Venus and Mercury in the pre-dawn morning sky in 1447 bc. Moses then set fire to a bush using either optical lenses or a small fire glass. (The worlds museums are full of both. There are over 400 near perfect optical lenses in Europe alone. They are classed as jewellery because the experts ‘knew’ that lenses didn’t exist at that time. The fire glasses are classed as make-up bottles despite the fact that the tops are so small that you cannot get anything except water in and out of them, and then only using a pin to do the emptying.) He then produced his set of rules and announced they were from God. Thus was born one monotheistic religion.
The divine shekinah was seen in the morning sky in 7 bc, on 25th. December. The Essene community ‘knew’ that a Messiah was prophesied. Jeshua, or whatever his name was, went on to complete a number of well-reported actions in just the manner that had been prophesied. (Much as the Jehovah’s Witnesses do today) This included 3 hours on a cross. It takes 3 days to die in this manner, from asphyxiation. The only check on his condition in that time, the spear prod, proved he was very much alive. Thus was born another monotheistic religion.
Some centuries later the divine shakeenah was seen by Mohammed who then retired to a cave (Not Plato’s!) and announced that he had communicated with God. Thus was born the third major monotheistic religion.
I return to the middle of the three. Christianity is based on a series of ‘Miracles’. Let us consider another of the main ones. Find your nearest friendly freemason and ask him if the raising of Lazarus could have been a masonic ceremony carried out by ‘The Master’, the ‘Great Initiate’. I suspect he will go into a state of shock, having never made the connection although it has been staring him in the face. This was no more a miracle than any of the others.
Whilst religion does give comfort to many it is, once more, becoming sufficiently dangerous to warrant opposition.
oh come on por, i made the christian dogma perforator specifically for you
Defend it against yourself…
Don’t listen to them, PoR, I think your entrance was spectacular. You have a wonderful stage presence. I’d like to put you into one of my plays.
I fear I must go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.
I wish you luck, noble knight, but these lands are not my own.
Why do I become a Christian?
Because everything Jesus said is true and if we follow his teachings we will create a better world.
Avocet
You ‘history’ of Christianity is based on a myth. Why don’t you attack the teachings of Christ?
So far no one has made any genuine attempts at the citadel. The Crusader laughs at your feeble effort.
There was only one true christian, and that was Jezus Christ himself. The others are just translations, and Paulus (of the letters of the new testament) being the worst.
POR wrote:
“Because everything Jesus said is true and if we follow his teachings we will create a better world.”
I’m so used to your style now, bold statements with no evidence. No you won’t create a better world, and I use you as hard evidence to prove what I just said.
PoR do you really need me to copy and paste my “Christian Dogma Perforator” into this thread? seems like a waste of ILP bandwidth, just go post on it!!
After some 2000-odd years, you Xtians have done a great job of NOT making a better world.
WTF? Hmm… 
“Halt, which foul demon goes there?” demanded PoR.
Out of the dark depths of the void below sprung up massive wurms, dragons, drakes, chimeras, cerebri, griffins, unicorns, and many more beasts of legend that were once believed to be only myth. The single crusader stands helplessly outnumbered before the massing horde of legendary beasts. As they drive towards the single puny warrior, even more springs forth from the black darkness below.
Following the mass of legends, thousands of goblins, moggs, saytrs, trolls, zombies, demons, fallen angels, and balrogs flow from the depths like an unrelentless onslaught. As the once thought mythical beasts galore storm the single crusader, they begin to form ranks to assualt the puny citadel.
The laugh of the crusader is thought to be in vain, and yet, it is also thought, is it better to die after a hearty laugh is finished, or during one?
PoR, It wasn’t a history of Christianity, it was an interesting, to me, connection between all the main monotheistic religions. It was not based on a myth, it was based on a fact. My interpretation of the fact is, of course, open to debate.
Why don’t I attack his teachings? I don’t claim to be an expert but a lot of what is attributed to him appears to make a lot of sense. Indeed I suggest you read the Gospel of Thomas which claims to have a further 119 direct quotes from ‘The Master’. Surely you must wish to know as much as possible about his ideas.
Don’t you ever look at all those intelligent people of other religions and find amazement that you belong to a race of creatures with such a staggering propensity for believing in something that is completely wrong?
And to whoever added the Emoticon, Thank you.
I’m a Christian, PoR, but I’ll throw one out for you:
You say you are a Christian because Jesus had good ideas, and the world will be better if we follow them. I could name probably a dozen people throughout history who have had good ideas. In fact, you and I could probably list 10 things the world could do to be a better place. Hell, Future Man has done it.
My question to you, sir, is why should anyone pay Jesus any more mind than Buddah, Krishna, you, me, or Future Man?
uccisore, i can only approximate what it means to hear you say that… even in reference to PoR… i hope you understand that the ‘christian award’ i bestowed upon you in the mundane babble thread was much more meaningful than i disrespectfully made it sound.
plus im also drunk so any capitalised reference to myself is pretty much like “i love you, man!”
respond to the criticism about your gay dogmas and you are as perfect as christians come.
Future Man, you and I have had it out before over the Gay Rights thing. As far as I can tell, neither of us have anything new to say. Go look up our discourse on the Social Sciences thread if you feel you need a response from me.
I hardly check the Mundane Babble forum. You gave me an award or something?
Sagesound
Nah, one can not possibly describe that laugh as a genuine laugh, but a mere chuckle at the ignorance of the infidels.
As the dark horde approaches the Citidel, the brave Crusader stood definant. He drew his sword of Justice and charged at the horde. And immediately the horde began to scatter. For they saw the Light emitted from the shinning sword held by the Crusader. They realised they have all been mislead by a foul maggot called Sagesound into attacking the impenetrable fortress of Truth, a battle in which they are destinied to defeat.
“ahhh, that foul maggot” they all cried.
(your turn to continue)
Uccisore
Because Jesus spoke the Truth. Everything Jesus said is infallible. I can easily rebuke everyone else.
It’d be funny if Jesus was kidding. You know, fucking with you.
But you originally wrote the crusader laughing, not chuckling. Pay attention to your own ignorance.
There are three things wrong with this segment you have written:
The first is implicating me as the person who let loose the demon horde. You are incorrect at making that assumption. I did not in anyway write who was leading the assualt, only that there was an assualt.
The second thing you have done wrong is label me a foul maggot. You have no basis for this assumption, so it can be concluded your comment was biased and out of anger. If you wrote in in retaliation against my comment of the crusader being puny, you will notice that description is meant to denote the contrast of one warrior versus a massive horde, instating that his defense amounts to nothing compared to thousands of demons.
The third and most critical thing you have done is breach a key rule in the making of simulated combat posts. It is illegal to write the actions of characters and things you do not control. It is also illegal to speak for other characters you do not control. If you will read my original combat post, you will notice that I did not write the actions of your crusader, nor did I speak for him. Understand that if I didn’t care about proceedure in a proper simulated combat post, your crusader would have been torn to shreds by now. If you cannot respect this rule, as I do, then you have no business making a thread devoted to simulated combat. Unto this rule, which you have broken, your post is hereby voided.
Read the third thing you did wrong again, idiot.
Now…you have two choices…you can either:
(1) re-write the post so that it does not break the rules I have named, or
(2) you can ignore this all and accept defeat.
If you choose the second choice, my response post would appear as this:
The thousands of creatures from the void did run from the light of the sword, for a moment. They then turned, ignoring the blinding effect of the light and slaughtered the single crusader. Although he did manage to put up quite a fight, slicing through a few dragons and stepping on some goblins, the numbers were too far against him. Just as his body was torn apart by a group of zombies that hungered for the flesh of the holy, Satan, rising from the dark void below pointed at the citadel and ordered his minions to break down every wall until nothing was left standing. With no given defense besides the crusader, the citadel never had a chance. Dragons torched it, wurms rammed through it, and the minions of darkness stormed through it. In the end, Satan peed on the empty throne of the citadel and watched his black urine melt the seat of power which no longer held any meaning of the word ‘holy.’
If on the other hand you choose the first choice, my response post would appear as this:
The legions of darkness, though blinded momentarily by the light of the sword, fell back and regrouped. Suddenly, out of the void, Satan rose from the black pits of the infernal darkness below and pointed to the crusader saying: “You are all that stands between me and this place from being decimated?” The Devil then let out a powerful laugh that gave perverse pleasure to all the denizens of hell. The renewed morale boost from the power of evil swept through the horde and their focus was no longer the crusader, whose defense was puny compared to their offense, but instead they charged for the citadel, not giving a damn about the crusader. Satan knew if the crusader tried to stop them all, their numbers would finish the job long before he would ever come close to stopping them.
I’m just wondering, would your massiah ever endorse a war for any reason?
Would he endorse the way animals interact? Survival of the fittest?
In fact, would he really endorse any type of competition?
I personally think Jesus was a communist, but that’s just from what I know about the guy. . .which is not much.
What would he do?