Yomama's advice

Eat fruits and vegetables

After reading this, you’ll NEVER look at the Banana in the same way again!!

Doctors - Home Remedy:
If you want a quick fix for flagging energy levels there’s no better snack than a banana. Containing three natural sugars-sucrose, fructose and glucose - combined with fiber a banana gives an instant, sustained and substantial boost of energy. Research has proven that just two bananas provide enough energy for a strenuous 90 minute workout. No wonder the banana is the number one fruit with the world’s leading athletes. But energy isn’t the only way a banana can help us keep fit. It can also help overcome or prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions making it a must to add to our daily diet.

Depression:
According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND amongst people suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating a banana. This is because bananas contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body converts into serotonin known to make you relax, improve your mood and generally make you feel happier.

PMS:
Forget the pills - eat a banana. The vitamin B6 it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood. (Don’t bring a rose, bring a banana.)

Anemia:
High in iron, bananas can stimulate the production of hemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anemia. Blood Pressure: This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in potassium yet low in salt making it the perfect to beat blood pressure. So much so, the US Food and Drug Administration has just allowed the banana industry to make official claims for the fruit’s ability to reduce the risk of blood pressure and stroke.

Brain Power:
200 students at a Twickenham (Middles) school were helped through their exams this year by eating bananas at breakfast, break and lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the potassium packed fruit can assist learning by making pupils more alert.

Hangovers:
One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover is to make a banana milk shake, sweetened with honey.
The banana calms the stomach and, with the help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system.

Heat burn:
Bananas have a natural antacid effect in the body so if you suffer from heart burn, try eating a banana for soothing relief.

Morning Sickness:
Snacking on bananas between meals helps to keep blood sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.

Mosquito bites:
Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing the affected area with the inside of a banana skin. Many people find it amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation.

Nerves:
Bananas are high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system.

Overweight and at work:
Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austria found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate and crisps. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most obese were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs. The report concluded that, to avoid panic induced food cravings, we need to control our blood sugar levels by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every two hours to keep levels steady.

Ulcers:
The banana is used as the dietary food against intestinal disorders because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit that can be eaten without distress in over chronicled cases. It also neutralizes over acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the stomach.

Temperature control:
Many other cultures see bananas as a ‘cooling’ fruit that can lower both the physical and emotional temperature of expectant mothers. In Thailand, for example, pregnant women eat bananas to ensure their baby is born with a cool temperature.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD):
Bananas can help SAD sufferers because they contain the natural mood enhancer, tryptophan.

Quit Smoking:
Bananas can also help people trying to give up smoking. The B6, B12 they contain, as well as the potassium and magnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.

Stress:
Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the heartbeat, sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body’s water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, there by reducing our potassium levels. These can be rebalanced with the help of a high potassium banana snack.

Strokes:
According to research in ‘The New England Journal of Medicine’ eating bananas as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death by strokes by as much as 40%!

Warts:
Those keen on natural alternatives swear that, if you want to kill off a wart, take a piece of banana skin and place it on the wart, with the yellow side out. Carefully hold the skin in place with a plaster or surgical tape!
So you see a banana really is a natural remedy for many ills. When you compare it to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrate, three times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitamins and minerals. It is also rich in potassium and is one of the best value foods around. So maybe its time to change that well known phrase so that we say,
“A Banana a day keeps the doctor away!” :smiley:

not to mention it fits snuggly and is even sorta self-lubricating.

That was gonna be my addition, but I figured you’d be on it.

Stop using Business Buzzwords That Make People Gag

No-brainer. “Maybe we could redefine this to mean a person who says it.”


“At the end of the day…”
Several readers complained that attorneys nowadays seem to start every other sentence this way. “At the end of the day, what really bugs me is people saying ‘at the end of the day.’” Is he a lawyer?


“Isn’t this cool?”
Heard at “any Microsoft presentation of any new software,” “Is it a rhetorical question, or do these people have a very limited vocabulary?”


Hit the ground running.
Oops. I used this one in a recent magazine column.


Touch base,
as in “Let’s touch base on this tomorrow.” “I don’t want to touch anyone’s base. It sounds as if it would lead to a sexual harassment lawsuit.”

Going forward, as in, “Going forward, let’s try not to use so many dumb clichés.” “What else would we do? Go back in time?” As if!

Win-win. The cynics among us loathe this one with a passion. W “It could as easily be ‘lose-lose,’ since neither party really wins.” Okay, then!

Core competencies. “If I hear the head of my division use this phrase one more time, I’m going to throw something at him,” “Something heavy.” Yikes. Division heads everywhere, you’ve been warned.

Mission-critical. Some of you hate this expression because it is frequently used to imply that one person’s contribution to a project is less important than someone else’s. Others, meanwhile, just think it sounds pretentious when businesspeople talk as if they were flying the Space Shuttle.

Thought leader. “Can you please kill this expression?” “It was bad enough to see PR people describe someone as a thought leader, but when I saw someone call himself a thought leader in his own bio, I wanted to throw up.”
[b]

Reference used as a verb[/b], as in, “Please reference page 12 in your training guide.” What’s wrong with the (grammatically correct) phrase "refer to"—or just “look at?”


Ping,
as in “I’ll ping you on this when I hear back from legal.” This bit of tech jargon “has jumped the fence into the non-tech world,” Let’s send it back.

There is no “I” in “team.” Some of you are so weary of hearing this, you’ve taken to snapping, “But there is an ‘M’, and look! An ‘E’!” Tsk, tsk.


Radar screen,
as in, “I’d like to get on your radar screen for a meeting next week.” “What are we, air traffic controllers?”

Bleeding edge, as in, “This is bleeding-edge technology.” Yuck. Can we put this one out of its misery?

Keep me posted or I’ll keep you posted. “These are usually conversation-enders indicating that no further information will be exchanged.”

Circle back , as in, “I’m just circling back to you on this”, which is often “a cutesy way of pestering you for a progress report that you’re probably not ready to give,”

On the same page. Third runner-up: 78 readers wrote to say they would be happy never to hear anyone say this again. Ever.

Cheerleader, as in calling oneself a cheerleader for a project or goal at work. Second runner-up, with 87 votes. “Can’t we leave high school behind us?”

Value proposition. Oy. “What is this exactly, and why does everything have to have one?”

One off. This is a comparatively new figure of speech frequently used to mean “privately,” as in, “You and I will talk about this one off, after the meeting.” It is also apparently why, according to many of you, nothing gets decided in meetings anymore.

By Anne Fisher

How about turning nouns into verbs? “Impact” is a milder version, but there really are some pretty stupid examples (wish I could think of some…). And who the heck decided to put semi-colons whenever there should be COMMAS or colons in biz docs?!

Actually, I remember reading some of my own biz docs from when I first was a “biz person” (was 21 and hired to start up a new scool/cultural centre; was shortly before I went back to university to pursue my university degree, which I did full time while running the school/cultural centre). It was before I took this amazing English course at the U with a prof who instilled in me the idea that saying complex things in simple English was a far better indicator of one’s mettle than using $150 words or using 100 words when 5 will do. Sheesh, my writing was pretty ugly then.

Okay, so I may ramble on in these forums, but I’m far more concise and cogent when I’m not throwing down posts quickly…

I, personally, like your rambling. You have 95 posts to go, and you will be a legendary rambler. hmmm. :wink:

Women Over 50 By Andy Rooney

As I grow in age, I value women who are over 50 most of all. Here are
just a few reasons why:

A woman over 50 will not lay next to you in bed and ask, “What are you
thinking?” She doesn’t care what you think.

If a woman over 50 doesn’t want to watch the game, she doesn’t sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it’s usually something more interesting.

A woman over 50 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is,
what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 50 give a damn what you might think about her or what she’s doing.

Women over 50 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won’t hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what
it’s like to be unappreciated.

A woman over 50 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women
friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn’t trust the guy with other women. Women over 50 couldn’t care less if you’re attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won’t betray her.

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a
woman over 50. They always know.

A woman over 50 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true
of younger women or drag queens.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 50 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest. They’ll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one! You don’t ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 50 for a multitude of reasons.Unfortunately,
it’s not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of
50+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 18-year-old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.

For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk
for free. Here’s an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against
marriage, why? Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig
just to get a little sausage.

:laughing:
i cant wait to be fifty!!

(Taken from a David Cross routine)

Usage of the word ‘Literally’: You hear sportscasters use this term all the time, “He literally ripped his head off on that play!!!”

What? no he didn’t… you shouldn’t be allowed to say and describe things to people… stop.

Gobbo

You’re absolutely correct. I remember once when I was at school assembly the teacher tkaing it told us a story of a man stuck on the side of a mountain with three broken legs and no jacket (or something) and he said “He was literally fading away”. Now obviously the man wasn’t actually dematerialising, he was just slowly dying. The man in the story survived, which is more than I can say for the reputation of the teacher.

of course… now the question is how did the mountain get three broken legs?

the moral of the story: three legged, jacketless mountain climbers need technicolor…

-Imp

Thanks, Bessy, I love bananas and it’s nice to know all the good it’s doing my body.

[size=200]DONT DRINK AND DRIVE![/size]

alcoholism.about.com/cs/drive/a/aa082797.htm

You kill someone - you’ll end up in jail. When you’ve been drinking, please call a friend to drive you home; don’t kill someone else’s.

I just wanted you to read the last post again! :sunglasses:

For those ILPers with kids who argue… I did the greatest thing with mine. I made them run laps around the house. Together. By three laps they were laughing and sharing the moment. Done deal. No yelling, no grounding, no spanking, no time out. Just laps!

did you wear black leather thongs and assorted cat of nine tails ? 11 inch heels ?

Black whip, mask with glitter, 12" heels, and a freakin megaphone. :sunglasses:

you can’t take 12 inch heels unless they’re platforms and you can’t walk on platforms.
liar liar pants on fire :smiley:

Go get another beer.

zeno knows alot about shoes…