The best book I have ever read is either, Don Quixote, by Cervantes or Candide by Voltaire. You’ve probably read both of those by now, but I would say that if it weren’t for those books, satire would be almost non-existent. Additionally, even though those novels make reference to things that happened in history, many of the observations can still be seen as holding true and applicable to this day. That fact is quite fascinating because it means that the observations that the authors thought they were making related to specific historical events actually apply to humanity as a whole.
…Or, maybe that was intended.
As far as a worst book is concerned, that’s kind of tough because I have a tendency to avoid finishing books that suck. I’m probably going to have to turn to books that we read in High School for this one, so I’ll say Romeo & Juliet. Unfortunately, the plot of that book is a rancid piece of shit and if Romeo were to exist in the present day, he’d probably be one of those whiny little emo bitch-boys that are constantly getting their asses handed to them. Actually, now that I think about it, their asses aren’t even worth kicking because you’d probably just end up getting sticky from and staining your clothes with their cheap hair product. Best to just stay away from them.
That’s Romeo.
Mercuito was the only compelling character in the whole goddamn thing, so of course, he had to get killed.
The biggest problem is that they killed themselves over one another. The thing that one must understand about most (MOST) High School children is the fact that they are emotionally and socially retarded, in varying ways and to varying degrees. So, the idea that one should (or even could) get so emotionally hung up over the death of another person that they have physically seen for a cumulative thirty-eight seconds that they kill themselves shouldn’t be taught.
In fact, anything involving suicide or people who happen to be emotional outliers shouldn’t be taught in High School because knowing about that kind of bullshit is what spawns trends like, “Goth,” “Emo,” “Vampire,” and God knows what else. The fashion and customs of these kids becomes so much more ridiculous year after year that the cutting off of one’s own penis and use of it as a necklace is probably going to be a fad before long.
On the other hand, some of the kids that get their ideas from this sort of drivel do commit suicide, so I suppose that at least infinitesimally counters over-population and reduces the pool of people competing for a scarce amount of resources. They don’t even compete anyway because their parents give them everything, and in exchange for what, so that their parents (who they hate) have to be embarassed to be seen in public with them?
The fuck kind of trade-off is that? Here is food, clothing, shelter and emotional nurture and in exchange all I need you to do is bad mouth capitalist consumerism and talk about how the whole world is meaningless and how you’d prefer to be dead in front of my boss. While you’re at it, can you briefly discuss those points with my golf buddies if you happen to see them? Actually, it would be better if you tell the NORMAL children of my golf buddies all about it, so they can tell their parents, so that I can have my fucking parenting questioned when I’m trying to putt!!!
I think I may have gone a little off-track here.
The point is, Romeo & Juliet sucks and encourages one to be a whiny little bitch.