Forgiveness

[Blurry]

@HexHammer

@BlurredSavant

Perhaps, if you attempted to answer the question I asked you rather than insinuate that I am unable to grasp simple concepts, we might find understanding. If you have nothing more to add, why are you here?

Probaly the same reason why you are here. I have already answerd you question like 2 times before, which you didn’t grasp, I’m tired talking to someone that doesn’t comprehend what I’m saying.

Ah, well now that you’ve edited your comment, let me respond in turn – where have you answered my question? I see nowhere in this thread where you explain how/why you believe that it is a fool’s errand to forgive someone.

[Humpty]

@BlurredSavant

@Humpty

i see forgiveness as more than letting go.

my dad was a pretty shitty dad. i don’t think about it all the time. i don’t sit there and stew in my anger. i let it go.
i haven’t forgiven him though. i don’t trust him, i don’t want to be around him.

to forgive someone, i think, means to trust them as you would have before they wronged you.
if a friend steals your watch and you find out, you don’t trust him for a while.
if he gives the watch back and apologizes – i still wouldn’t trust him right away.
i might not be angry any more, i might have “let it go,” but now i know what kinda guy this is, and i still don’t trust him the way i did before he took it.
he’d have to earn the trust back. that’s the biggest part of forgiveness that the moral slaves skip out on – they don’t think the forgivee is responsible for earning the trust back.
well i do.

This concept of forgiveness is unrealistic. We are humans. People say “Forgive and forget” as if the two are one and the same, but that is just not possible. I can never forget the man who beat me every opportunity he got for three years. That’s branded into my very soul for the rest of my life. I don’t have to go on being angry about it, though. I can accept, accept that there is something very wrong with a person who would beat a small child, and accept that there is nothing I can do to change it. At that point, I forgive him. My forgiveness doesn’t justify his actions, but it allows me to move beyond my pain, to no longer be his victim.

seems to me we don’t fundamentally disagree really, we’re just using the same word to describe different things.