I miss my friend I walked through recovery with. I saw him come back from the dead. I saw life in his eyes where before was misery. And I saw him fade back out. And I’m fricken pissed about it. He said stupid bullshit to other people, like he only drinks once a month, or once a week, never drunk at work. Addiction turns people into liars, etc.
Fricken anyway.
“Ichthus. You really don’t understand. One persons poison is another persons medicine.”
Bullshit.
“Try eating peanuts when you get anaphylaxis from them. Poison.”
I wish when alcohol turns you into a dumbass, you’d go into anaphylactic shock.
“Others always feel better when they eat peanuts.”
And?
“The problem with your god psychology is that you think everyone needs to be like you in order to make life perfect. Look around you. That’s demonstrably false.”
Ummm… how is that demonstrated, exactly?
“I’d never want you to rule existence (let alone anyone)”
Tough. We have free will for a reason. Do good stuff with it.
“You have a pride of yourself that’s unbecoming to you.”
Maybe ‘cause I became?? Jk.
“I’ve met alcoholic smokers who’ve lived 90+ years and died of natural causes.”
And?
“Look at Keith Richards!!! Fuck, that guy has done more drugs than almost anyone… he’s fine.”
Would he agree?
“Your puritanical streak is naive.”
How am I being puritanical exactly?
“The most important thing is that whatever you do… That you’re not a shithead.”
We’re all shitheads to varying degrees. Let’s not obsess over it & just focus on doing good stuff. If we stuff our heads with good stuff, the shit makes room like you’re popping a shit pimple.
Speakin o which… I’m going for a walk.