But it might be too late for me. Which fucking sucks.
But whatever, I have a job, I have a house, life is good.
Once yoi do violence, you can’t undo it.
The reason I acted out was that I formed the enemy paranoia that comes over me, probably from having had contact with actual dangerous people, and an image formed in my head. I instantly open the website and see “daft cunt.”
Only now am I realizing what he actually meant by it.
For what it’s worth. Maybe not much. I do know I’m fucked in the head. @niallm
Well what the fuck. A coffee and some chess.
God’s blessing is on you, nial. Neither me nor anyone else can do shit about that.
If the bottle ever does come up, come and kill me first.
Thank you Ichthus. And Nial.
I hope I can eventually deserve the life you both saved. I hope I can give some measure back.
I may be an idiot, but I’m not stupid.
- How were you an accomplice?
- From what were you spared?
- Who is editing your posts?
What happened to the Cheese?
I’m sorry, @promethean75.
It doesn’t do to be too judgemental.
Well. That confirms my suspicions that yer all cracked.
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Here’s some cheese to go with that whine:
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I think my subconscious had made up its mind that it wanted the soul toughening, so it took the first paranoid avenue.
From here where, I don’t know. The chores of the day I suppose.
That’s how the subconscious works. You rarely “do things for reasons.” When it’s subconscious, you rather look for excuses to perpetuate cycles. Like a corrupt cop, you will create an excuse if you can’t find one.
This whole thing makes me feel very vulnerable. I’m out here talking about it, because I am desperate not to collapse (or was), but I felt unarmed.
I think I was in the middle of doing something very important for myself. I will try to get back to that. Let’s see what the day brings.
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It’s an interesting choice of words, no? “The dark side.” The subconscious is the dark side. The side you don’t see inside of.
I don’t know. Maybe if you drain the poison from some of the things I wrote, there might be something useful in there.
Coffee.
Probably lots.
15 characters.
I did, I edited all that. I lashed out against the two people I can call friends in a long time. Ain’t that a bitch.
Pluto. The snake, the scorpion. I know this bores the shit out of you guys.
Pluto is the planet of the subconscious, more, of the id. The snake and scorpion are its animals. They slither areound in secret hidden paths. In the slithery secret paths, where most walk thoughtlessly, they apply extreme intention. In this way they carry out their lives, as great predators who never the less do not get suspected, let alone noticed. Until they feel attacked. I once got stung by a scorpion. I had no ill will to it, I just got up barefoot in the middle of the night to take a piss.
Then my roommate killed it and I felt like shit.
What did it feel like to get stung by it?
Two sharp little punctures, much less then a bee. Then when the poison hits it feels like several knives stabbing you in the area.