What are you doing? (Part 2)

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The real danger and most irritating thing about em is that they believe they have the authority to pester, meddle, interfere, and impose themselves onto everyone’s business because they have god behind them.

This pitiful charade would be worse if any of them had any real power like the big ones that end up as cult leaders. The little ones like the freak here are just pests that you can’t get rid of.

Now, the only reason why interaction with this freak here persists between it and other members is because a) they’re pieces of fake shit like she is or b) they tolerate its presence because its foul nature and toxicity is concealed behind casual philosophical discourse. They kinda momentarily forget what a sham this person is and do the polite thing and respond.

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I am now receiving calls from State mental health services offering to qualify me as crazy and in need of medical help funded by badly managed working class tax payer dollars instead of… wait for it… just taking me off a registry that a) I shouldn’t be on and b) doesn’t work anyway.

I hope you guys are fast enough to keep up here. You need to put your Leibniz and St. Alanso or whatever his name is books down and read my posts. Not those idiot’s nonsense. This is philosophy right here. Right here.

Even this little mundane post presents you with a single philosophical absurdity more profound than anything you will ever experience or be a part of. And you ARE a part of it. This is YOUR State doing this. Your leaders. People you are obedient too or would even defend if they took action against me!

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… people you would willingly hand your hard earned dollars over to so they can house me in a state mental institution. You know how many board games are in any given mental institution dayroom closet at any given time? Thousands of dollars worth of games, and YOU bought every one of em. And the group trips to the museum. You think those are cheap? When i was at Dix back in 88 i spent a day on the town that had to cost tax payers at least two hundred dollars. I’m talking movies, pizza parlor, shoe store at the mall, and every one of us loons got a share of it.

Is that what you wanna do? Let your State make me crazy so they can then commit me and force you to pay for it? That’s the retardedest shit i ever heard.

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The wretched will always gladly pay to bring down the strong, happy. It is the meaning of their lives.

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We would walk on those very two steps every Thursday (if i recall) on our way to McBride building to visit the canteen and spend our allowances on candy bars, sodas, and play pool for an hour.

But to get to the canteen, we had to pass down the hall and through the section of the building that housed the level seven nuttjobs. The real deals. Criminally insane, schizophrenics, catatonics, multiple personalities, nymphomaniacs, the whole gamut of crazies. Now obviously we kids wouldn’t be put into contact with any of em for any length of time but some of the better behaved ones were allowed to wander the halls. Met an old lady once who thought i was her nephew. But we would hear the most dreadful wailing from the corridors as we passed down the hall toward the canteen. Lord only knows what those poor creatures were going through to make such hideous, inhuman sounds.

DixCampus
DixCampus1080×810 311 KB

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Just look at that building. The cold impersonal clinical sight of it. How logically rigid and scientific it is, so perfectly built, stacks of cells that store crazy people like commodities or test rats. Where the fuck is Foucault when you need em. That dull sun browned concrete so old and relentless, staring at you as you approach in the back of the padded van. Insane old ladies dressed in state gowns dancing in fenced-in courtyards singing in unintelligible tongues. Doctors in brown suits sitting on benches underneath magnolia trees writing notes on clipboards. Overweight balding male nurses pushing catatonics around in wheelchairs. Bursts of laughter erupting from nowhere for no obvious reason. Some crazy over by the shuffle board staring at dandelions is having the time of his life.

It all happened there. I saw it. I saw it all, goddammit.

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I gotta say that thing yesterday with the cat lady being told something by the cops she’s not allowed to repeat to me has got me shook up a little. So I’ll write a little note for the Prom task force to read. I think it’d be a good idea.

Greetings, Prom task force. I don’t know if you know much about my history, my dealings with the law and what i have been through, but I should let you know that conspiring against me in any way is an extremely bad idea. If i so much as feel a nose hair tickle at the thought of you springing some bullshit on me and making my life even harder than it already is as a wrongfully convicted life time sex offender, i will disappear faster than you can say ‘oh shit’ and very bad things will start happening very quickly.

If you would like to help the matter, the best thing you can do is either a) make sure I don’t ever sense you too are conspiring against me and wish to do me harm or b) petition the governor of NC to clear my record of offenses commited in 2010 and 2016 and remove me from the registry.

Other than that, you are wasting tax payers dollars driving around playing protective services agent and you are also adding fuel to the fire.

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The cat lady has received upwards of eight letters from the internet stalker now. The cat lady would like the internet stalker to go away, so i advise her on the matter.

https://voca.ro/1hGi2c8dlCNm
https://voca.ro/12k8zzKb0f38

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Hmmm, i wonder. If the federal government is aware of the data showing the ineffectiveness of the sex offender registry and yet it still remains, it means the federal government is incompetent enough not to care that the states are sucking money from the federal government to fund their own useless sex offender registries. Maybe then the disconnect between the state and federal government due to the overall systemic incompetence of the structure of these governments due to a Marxist revolution never happ… nevermind, you’re already lost.

But what if the states are knowingly keeping their registeries up because it provides jobs for fat black women in deputy uniforms to sit behind sex offender division desks filing their nails all day when they’re not out stalking sex offenders and showing up unannounced at their house in a swat van. I mean, it’s not a bad idea. The SO registry does create jobs and Taco Bell can’t hire everyone.

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I’ve got an old friend who ended up on that registry because he was pissing behind a gas station and didn’t realize that the building across the street was a police station. The gas station wouldn’t let anyone use their restrooms, and he just had to go. A lot of people could have walked away from it just fine, but he wasn’t the type to have things go over smoothly with the cops. Dude literally got some indecent exposure charge or something like that even though he was behind a gas station pissing by a dumpster in the middle of the night. Cops do crazy shit. Like one when myself and a friend of mine caught a burglar, and because 2 years before that, this now-burglar had once rented a room from the guy, the cops said that constituted a “domestic relation” and charged the guy with domestic violence…for catching a burglar. We’re the ones who called the cops to let them know we had the guy. Real crazy shit.

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We forum fellas wanna pay tribute to all the beloved forum ladies we’ve come to so much admire over these long philosophical years at ILP.

It’s a stormy night, and you’re sitting old, broken, and alone in your house/flat/apartment/psychiatric ward room ready to watch Prom and Satyr and Reas and Saully and Jakob and Humz and Ecmandu and all the rest of em flood the forum threads, rip off their shirts and beat the other guy senseless in an argument. This is you. Every night.

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We’re back at the hospital to get a blood test. The left eye is now wasted like the right eye was a month ago, so I’m pushing for a Toxoplasma chorioretinitis test.

Should i let this one be the last straw or wait for something better? Wrongfully convicted sex offender trapped in a disgusting catlady’s house because nobody will rent to him has his eyes eaten out by a feces born parasite that thrives in a three foot tall stack of bagged cat shit she collects in the back room.

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Lol, I’m doing exterior wood repair for a slum landlord from india, and i got my ladder leaned up against the gutter to get to the roof. The gutter (that’s hanging there by one screw and about to fall off at any moment) shifts down just a hair under the weight of the ladder, and the legs slip backward. Fell off, hit the first roof, rolled down that roof, and then hit the ground. Two falls about ten feet. In 25 years, I’ve never fallen off a ladder.

I get to the emergency with my arm cradled in my shirt like a sling… bloody shingle scraps all over me, just drove thirty minutes (almost crashed from lightheadedness). I walk in and see at least twenty black people all sitting in the waiting room playing on their phones. None appear to be in any visible distress. I say the following words to the ugly receptionist at the desk: fell off a ladder. Left arm may be broken or fractured. Need an ice pack and some tylenol ASAP. She smiles, takes my info, and says they’ll be with your shortly.

I hobble over to an available seat and sit down. Swooning from side to side in pain. I wanna see how long it takes them. After five minutes passes i return to the ugly one, now playing on her phone, and ask a fantastic question: hey, do you guys have an ice machine? She pauses for a second and then it hits her. She literally reaches into a drawer right beside her and pulls out a cold compress bag.

She had them there the whole time and could have given me one when i walked in.

Back in my seat, i wait. The nurses are informed of walk-ins and are supposed to prioritize the patients. In the next 30 minutes, three otherwise perfectly healthy looking people are called to the triage. Still i sit there. On the 45-minute mark, i walked out. Can’t sit around here all day waiting to get a tylenol and a seven minute arm x-ray.

Arm may be broken. Gonna give it a day and then return to wake med at around 2:00 in the morning when there’s not many people there so i can be seen in under an hour.

Short staffing. Capitalism.
Waiting room full of lower class black people who freak out when they get the sniffles and rush to an emergency room where they can get something for free. Capitalism. Slum landlord with a property that should be condemned. Capitalism.

Lol and the retard actually stood there and watched me load my 24 ladder onto my truck with one arm. Didn’t even offer to help. How the fuck did this imbecile even get a house? Oh… he accumulates the capital he raises exploiting indian workers and then flies over to america to exploit the american working class by becoming a slum landlord.

Dropped a whole gallon of paint during the fall, and it splattered all over the lower roof. Have to replace at least fifteen. Was totally my fault.

Top all this off with the $500 labor quote i gave him for work any other contractor would have charged double for.

Filthy cat lady cat shit collection Toxoplasmosis update. Never had the blood test (too expensive) but the pain and redness has subsided a bit. Foggy vision but not terribly bad. If it is the parasite it may have relaxed a little in there. They say people live with the parasite all the time.

Cool. I’m good with that. Most people would move elsewhere if they shared a house with a filthy piece of human trash that collected cat shit, but I’m not like most people. Those people are asking too much i think.

(You have to put all the gems i give you together and look at em. Not one at a time. Stand amazed by how compounded they all are. Follow the story, pay attention. Only then might you realize that there is no god and this world is shit. And don’t mistake this as a complaint. This is, in fact, excellent news for a certain kind of tragic hero resigned to his fate like myself)

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Ew here’s a cool little exercise for you level 2 freewillists to read like five times and not understand wtf I’m sayin.

I am responsible for making the judgement: this ladder is positioned safely, and the gutter won’t move behind it" but i am not responsible for believing that i made the right judgement… because if I’ve leaned a ladder against a gutter a hundred times in identical circumstances and not fallen, it would not be unreasonable to suppose i wouldn’t fall this time either. Ergo, i did not have the freewill to believe i was safe, but i bear the full responsibility of making the judgement based on that belief. To be clear of this error, I would have to suspend myself in radical Humean skepticism and refuse to climb the ladder… knowing that just because I’ve done the same thing a hundred times doesn’t mean I’m gonna do it a 101th time.

Freewill only insofar as that means ‘responsible’ (which means bearing the consequences) but not insofar as “making a bad decision”.

My example can be exemplified in a hundred other ways, too. For example, it was not unreasonable for me to assume that i wouldn’t be charged with a crime i didn’t commit… so flashing sexy asian callgirl (had to be the way she was dressed) prepared to face a simple misdemenor if caught was neither an irrational or irresponsible thing to do.

But the district attorney switched it up on me… like the slum landlord did with his gutter trap. Anomalies. They get you every time. It’s the ones that shouldn’t and don’t have to exist that are the bitch. Not issues with the fuckin sun rising every morning. The ones you shouldn’t have to worry about; lying prosecutors and slum land lords with gutter death traps.

Edit:

Ew, this kinda alludes and is related to N’s “the right to make promises.” It’s Humean in a sense. The irregularity of nature, its timeless lack of design and purpose, ruthlessly dealing out good and bad luck with no rhyme or reason… how could anyone hold firm to anything, promise anything, say, “i choose this responsibly because i am certain i should!”

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Alright here’s what we got. Fingers are movable, though sore af. This is good. If it were broken, I’d be writhing in pain right now. Could be fractured, but that will heal on its own eventually and without needing to plunge further into masochistic self hating western liberal conservatard christian middle working class backward-ass masses bad credit and medical bill debt.

Appears to be a large pocket of blood underneath the skin. Could have crushed an artery or vein. There’s a dark bump on the forearm with a balloon like softness. Not like a bruise. Extreme pressure in the region as if fluid were being forcefully compressed. Heaviness. I believe the blood will be broken down and absorbed through the tissue on its own.

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when i was in college and sold some drugs, i didn’t have insurance but would just pay the office visits etc if i got sick. but then one time i crashed a crotch rocket and broke my hand on this really curvy road, and since a broken hand is probably a lot of money, i went to the free-ish, sliding fee scale hospital and told them that i was an unemployed student.

that one bone that connects your thumb to your wrist was just broken clean in half and separated by about 2 inches on the xray. needed surgery and casts for what ended up being a long time, more than 6 months worth of casts, pins in it and all that.

it was only 53 bucks for the whole shabang, but…there was no surgeon available, so i just had to go home with a broken hand, swolen up bigger than a grapefruit where my fingers looked like little nubs on a ball for about 3 days before i could get surgery. so that sucked. but on a positive note, i think i ended up getting nearly 1000 hydrocodones out of the whole deal and made some good $ off it all in the end, and my hand is fine.

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i recently bought a house that was bought by a flipper in 2022 and they did the entire thing, roof, all floors, kitchen, bathroom, plumbing, wiring, everything. made it real nice. then they tried to rent it like the rent seeking pieces of shit that they are, but got overleveraged and ended up declaring bankruptcy and losing it in foreclosure. i got it directly from the bank at a price below appraisal and they probably still are stuck with some debt from it or something.

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edited because i dont know how to delete

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Sometimes I’ll tell someone the story of how these guys one snatched me off a sidewalk and one of them took my car, then they shoved me into an suv and pointed guns at me on the way to handcuff me to a table in the basement of this abandoned building for 12 hours before finally taking me to my place to rob me blind. Then people’s eyes will get big and they imagine the level of trauma that would result from something like that. Then I tell them is was a bunch of special agents from the state bureau of investigation and in at least some cases is strikes them that there are very good reasons to be anti police in at least some cases. Like if anyone else did that sort of thing to people they’d go to prison for life. These guys just ride around doing shit like that all day and we pay them to do it.

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That’s fucked up, boss. The only time I’ve had a gun pointed at me was a shotgun in my face when i was asking too many questions about how and where dude’s uncle grew his weed. He thought i was an informant. I was there buying a bag and uncle came out with it and boom, i thought i was a dead adolescent.

…

Got a small job in a condo across the street from where i grew up. Talk about nostalgia.

So this guy is one of those petite bourgeois with high blood pressure that lives off of rental properties. Not wealthy enough to attend the four star parties but certainly makes enough to hang out at Snookers with groups of men like himself and brag about his most recent exploits.

We start with a laugh at some poor woman who’s in debt, has bad credit, was evicted, and then had the nerve to ask him for an apartment. Some scumbag working class lady prolly. Yeah, right. Hit the road, lady. I’m not renting to you.

I think i was supposed to crack rich guy jokes about the lady with him, but i messed up and actually almost started to defend her. Pretty close call. It’s hard wearing a mask around everyone else walking the earth because they’re either an idiot or a scumbag or somewhere in between.

Then the guy jacks up his price because he’s afraid i won’t do the job tomorrow, and he wants to get the thing ready and rented out. Sure, I’ll take $600 for it.

Now you’d think you should feel better about the guy when he offers more than my price. Hey that was nice of em. But when you discover that a few hundred dollars more is pocket change and he’ll make it back in a month with his outrageous rent, he doesn’t seem so nice anymore.

You gotta know where to look, man. They’re all sharks.

I was late on hitting record. He had just got done listing all the things he’s been in charge of; yeah, i used to be the head of this, and i did that, and i run these, etc.

https://voca.ro/1obVRXukIHWb

“Champagne tastes and beer budgets. They don’t know wtf their talking about”